(haiku/13)

poor little victim

it's everyone
else's fault

the shadows
are fed


©bev stillwell 2014

pessimist

"we" are not
broke

its your story

"we" haven't had
bad luck

for i find lessons
in all things

"we" are not
afraid

the fears
belong to you

"we" are not
depressed

you play
that instrument
alone

ive tried to help
because no one
else will

but now
its clear
you only see me
as your reflection

so you can
feel validated
in your misery


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/12)

dark thoughts
generate

images
of sweet revenge

forgive me,
my love


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/11)

take my
everything

into the belly
of yours

unleash
this fire!


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/10)

wishing you would call

asking me to understand

why you let me go




©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/9)

when your cruel
heart beats

love becomes
riddled with pain

you dont
deserve me


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/8)

this conflicted mind

dreams of passionate affairs

wanting so much more


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/7)

born a warrior

hell rushed into
the light of me

my mission fulfilled


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/6)

subconscious forces

where the
dark angel
resides

she fears
nothing here


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/5)

the moon
stirs
my soul

taking me
to worlds
unknown

i gladly
follow


©bev stillwell 2014

sly

i wont
confront
when i catch
your lies

i'll just
watch
and wait

you'll
embarrass
yourself,
eventually

i wont
share
your gossip

because
i know
its only
a matter of time

til i am
your next target

i won't
bad mouth you
to others

or try
and warn them

they'll figure
it out
one day

i dont smile
because i like you

i smile,
knowing what
you're capable of

i'm always
one step ahead

and until
you figure this out

which you
probably never will

you'll forever
be the puppet
to my game


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/3)

my wings
have been clipped

i will
glue them
back together

soon,
they will fly
again


©bev stillwell 2014

afflicted

being sensitive
doesn't mean
i overreact

it means
i feel pain
on a deeper level
than most

this burden
can only be accessed
because i care
so much

when i love you
only you
can hurt me

when i respect you
only your words
can sting

when i have
your back,
to those
who dont

only you
can blind side me

im far from perfect
but am
a good friend

and i would
give you the world
if i could

in times like these
i wish
there were a pill

that would
block me
from feeling so
passionately


©bev stillwell 2014

(haiku/2)

can u see my soul

without lust
in your eyes?

i am so much more,
than pretty


©bev stillwell 2014

haters

low self-esteem
fearing to be great
projecting misery
it's you
not me

lies
malicious intent
instigated drama
it's you
not me

criticism
judgement
envy
it's you
not me

striving to be

accepted
understood
worthy
it's you
not me

hey, haters!

i'm comfortable
in my own skin

it's impossible
to bring me down

i will continue
to shine
excel
achieve

so back the "F" off!

please and thank you


©bev stillwell 2014

fiend

he pierced the skin
of her neck

blood descends
upon her breast

ecstasy
within his hypnotized
eyes

he quenched
his desire

and left her to die


©bev stillwell 2014

a haiku for anne

her fiery red hair!

a face,
wrinkled with laughter

amused,
by the silliest things


©bev stillwell 2014

*in loving memory of my childhood
friend's mom*

vibrations

intensity
electricity
lucid dreams

need to find a sanctuary
a quick retreat

replenish my resources
exhale
release

let go of what doesnt serve others,
let go of what doesn't serve me

let go
let go
breathe

let go
let go
release


©bev stillwell 2014

moon child

the moon child weeps
for the secrets she keeps

a lonely empath
destined to see

it threatens her sanity
for she has no relief

feeling everything
EVERYTHING
to such extremes

a gift some say
but she can never be free

the moon child weeps,
she weeps

©bev stillwell 2014

pai

he is a scorpio
the most evolved one
ive ever known

the gifts of his energy
touches so many

and fills my soul with love

he operates as the phoenix
loyal
honest
and kind

unselfish with his time
and resources

the best friend you could find

he is the greatest cuddle bug
in the world

the most compassionate
and sensitive man with this sign

he will forever be
appreciated by me

the one,
the only one,
he calls daughter

©bev stillwell 2014

the other me

how can i say 'dont be rude'
when my words havent been kind lately?

how can i speak of faith
while filling my own mind with worry?

how can i advise someone to follow their dream
when ive been putting mine on hold?

how can i suggest forgiveness
when ive been carrying around pain?

how can i muster anything at all
without being a complete hypocrite?

damn, EGO!!

reexamine 101


©bev stillwell 2014

idée fixe

his eyes bare my soul
i pretend im unaware
my heart pounding
my rhythm off

he walks in the room
i go the opposite direction,
hoping to catch my breath
my heart pounding
my rhythm off

his energy pulls me in
i struggle to remain detached
intense passions boiling over
my heart pounding
my rhythm off

an unforbidden union
a secret i'll keep locked away
my heart pounding
my rhythm off


©bev stillwell 2014

sol

restoration from the rawness
of murkiness and bitter cold

oh, sunshine!
my heart weeps
none in your presence

within your luminosity
i am reawakened,
empowered

my liveliness
and playfulness bestowed.

a dispensation of gratitude
for the miraculous ways

in which you
harmonize my soul


©bev stillwell 2014

just me

ive made a cluster of indiscretions
been a super bitch, at times
and allowed my pride to swallow common sense

these elements have shaped my character into the person i am today
therefore,
i am free of regrets


©bev stillwell 2012

lotus

a single lotus
originating from the illusion of darkness
my soul reaches to heaven
as my beauty unfolds

each moment the sun kissed my forehead
i find peacefullness awaiting there

the sacred mother,
reflecting the lake
purifying body and mind

despite my home in muddy waters
i am free from earthly attachments



©bev stillwell 2012

ice queen

she radiates
evervesant light
whispers of haunting tales

her mineral beryl eyes
shine in mystic observation
shreds cloaks of webbed fabrication

she appears benumb,
captive
crystallized

unmoved by manipulations


©bev stillwell 2012

just because

just because i smile
doesn't mean there isn't pain

just because im nice
doesnt mean being naive

just because im sensitive
doesnt mean i am weak

just because you tell me no
doesnt mean i will shrink

and just because you're reading this
doesnt mean anything at all


©bev stillwell 2014

untitled

her phantom eyes
reveal tales of great horror
her sly smile
says she's unafraid

regret and uncertanity
she cannot muster
for truth and transformation
is her crusade


©bev stillwell 2012

dark night of the soul

journey to the dark night of soul
ghosts
demons
back stabbers be told
loss
forgiveness
fire!
and lies
thieves
villains
vampires
I RISE
bruised and broken
warrior fight
tired and praying
reclaiming my light
for nights and days
I cried, I cried
lessons to atone
and purify
at the termination
of this crossing
I let go of what was never mine
and today
I love and live
more authentically

©bev stillwell 2012

peresephone

six months to roam the earth
in search of what Ive known

the light collapsed around me,
hades came to take me home

his dark eyes abated
from the sweetness of my soul

yet I cursed his abduction
and begged him to let me go

his control and obsession
submerged my spirit

yet, my love
he could not own

©bev stillwell 2014